It's my favorite park because it's new and feels so safe. The sidewalks don't jut up and encourage you to trip, fall and break your arm. The park has airplanes, soccer fields, dog parks, picnic tables, a Parks and Recs officer (with a spiffy uniform), and is squeeky clean, (the park and most likely the officer, too, although I can't say for certain.)
I called my buddy, Joe, who's working on a new creative project. I wanted to get the scoop and burn cals at the same time. I talked to him on my cell and walked around the park. I passed the soccer games, the dog parks, the airplanes, the cute Trick or Treater kids, picnic people, skateboarders, and the children on motorized scooters who always seem to try and run me over. (People who try and run me over, no matter what their age or vehicle of choice, irritate me.)
Joe's creative idea was really good, so we kept talking. We talked through soccer games. On lap #82, (rough estimate), around the field I realized all the soccer players, parents, coaches had left. The enormous soccer field was empty. Hmm.
We kept yakking and I kept walking. I noticed the lights dimmed dramatically at the dog park, and all the dogs had gone home. The Trick or Treaters had vanished as well as the scooter children.
We blabbed and I walked. Three parking lots had emptied out, and there were now only 5 cars total in all of the lots. The park ranger was gone. I looked up in the sky and saw that dang moon. Full, beautiful, a little eerie.
Then I spotted a beat-up van pull into the parking lot. And watched as the driver parked in the space directly next to my car.
I flashed to Silence of the Lambs serial killer, the Skinner, with his van. While I am not chubby enough to be skinned, (to those who might argue that point with me, I say Shush), I still didn't want to tempt some wacko. It dawned on me that while I love watching Law and Order, every unit, I'm walking in a dark deserted park on Halloween by myself. Am I nuts? (Don't answer that.) I write murder mysteries but I don't want to become a vic of one.
Upon this realization, my cell goes dead, (Swear to God.) I watch creepy Van Guy. He eyes me. I give him my best I'm evil and crazy you don't want to mess with me, look. He steps out of the van and walks towards the picnic tables. I race to my car, unlock it, jump in, jam the lock button, fire up the engine and pedal to the metal out of that parking lot.
I get home all weirded out and realized the Kitten, (aka LOLA), had a Relaxation Tip. It's a breathing technique called, "Lion's Breath".
Lion's breath is meant to open your mouth, throat and literally roar out all that frustration, anger, fear, anxiety. It's an empowering breath and builds courage. While Lola is demonstrating Lion's Breath while lying on her back, this is not necessary. You can do Lion's breath seated, or in yoga positions, such as down dog. Do stick your tongue out and down towards your chin. Do make a roar. Repeat several times.
**Do this technique gently if you have TMJ issues. Don't do this around people who have recently had heart attacks or strokes. Don't do around people who already suspect you're a nutjob.**
But check it out. You'll be amazed at all the tension you release in this one easy exercise. Let me know how it goes.
**Safety Tip!** My new favorite client reminded me that one is never supposed to get into their car if a Creepy Van or Truck or RV, whatever pulls up next to you in a dark parking lot. Get someone to walk you to your car. If that's not an option, get in on the passenger side and squeeze over.
Rock on Darlings,
DocPammyDuMond,DC




